It's been a really rough week. I was in the emergency room 3 times because of panic and anxiety attacks, and I've been struggling with dark and depressing thoughts. It all started last Sunday when I suddenly started thinking about getting older and eventually dying. Since then I have not been able to stop thinking about it.
My therapist says it's because I do not feel grounded. I also think I need to be on some sort of medication. I was given some ativan by the one of the ERs, but all it really did was make me drowsy. My Doctor prescribed me Hydroxyzine (I think that's the name). I'm going to go pick it up in a little bit. I also plan on making an appointment with a Psychiatrist to talk about going on something permanent.
I'm hoping going back to doing my podcast will help. I'm also going to start meditating and hooping again soon. Haven is also coming up, and I plan on going.
I just want to feel better again.